Commandments Not Suggestions

I was listening to a talk this week given by President Thomas S. Monson in 2009 that contained the following quote:

We have actually convinced ourselves that slogans will save us. "Shoot up if you must; but use a clean needle." "Enjoy sex whenever with whomever you wish; but [protect yourself]."

No.  The answer is no.  Not "no" because it isn't cool or smart or because you might end up in jail or dying in an AIDS ward--but no, because it's wrong.

What Moses brought down from Mt. Sinai were not the Ten Suggestions, they are Commandments.  "Are," not "were."  (Tedd Koppel, Duke University commencement address, 1987)

I had to look twice to make sure that this actually came from the mouth of a widely known and respected news anchor because it sounds so unlike the typical liberal rhetoric we hear coming from our TVs and radios.  I admire the courage it took for him to speak these words to an audience most likely made up of many people who probably did not share his views.  However, I admire even more those who actually walk a commandment-keeping walk in their daily lives despite the ever-changing views of the society around them.

In my studies this week, I found a new favorite scripture in Ecclesiastes 12:13:  Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter:  Fear God, and keep his commandments:  for this is the whole duty of man."  People can argue over whether or not the commandments--not just the ten but those found throughout the scriptures--are outdated, but the fact still remains that "God is the same yesterday, today, and forever, and in him there is no variableness neither shadow of changing" (The Book of Mormon, Mormon 9:9).  As Elder Dallin H. Oaks so aptly puts it, ". . . man's laws cannot make moral what God has declared immoral.  Commitment to love and serve God requires that we look to His law for our standard of behavior" (No Other Gods, October 2013 LDS General Conference).  

In my opinion, I don't think there are any grey areas when it comes to what God expects us to do and not do, and we can certainly trust that whatever he requires of us will shape us into a much better, happier person that what we might become otherwise. I think that we often talk about the grey area between what is wrong and what is right as a way to excuse ourselves and others for bending the rules a little.  This kind of spiritual fence-sitting seems to be an excuse for not fully committing to a Christ-centered life that may seem a little daunting at first, but in actuality brings a deep sense of joy and happiness.  I believe that God has given us commandments because He loves us.  As parents, we often wish we had an instruction manual for our children.  Well, God has given us instructions in the form of commandments that will lead families back to Him.  I know there are great blessings that come from obedience to God.  

I have included links to talks on this subject below:

May You Have Courage

No Other Gods

Coincidence or Tender Mercy

I believe that many of the little miracles we see in our lives are mistakenly labeled "coincidences."  This label keeps us from seeing God's hand in our lives and causes us to brush past the lessons of love that are right in front of us.  In a 2005 LDS General Conference talk called, The Tender Mercies of the Lord, Elder David A. Bednar stated, I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are real and that they do not occur randomly or merely by coincidence.  Often, the Lord's timing of His tender mercies helps us both discern and acknowledge them. 

If there is one thing that I have learned about God and His Son, Jesus Christ, it is that they are mindful of us as individuals.  They are aware of our weaknesses, our struggles, our desires, and our needs.  There have been things that have happened in my life that to some may seem like simple coincidences, but because God knows me, I know they were answers to simple, heartfelt prayers. 

One such event occurred as I lay in a hospital bed during my third pregnancy.  After 7 blood transfusions and a hospital stay that would last until the birth of my son six weeks later, I felt weak and discouraged.  I had been unable to care for my two other young children for weeks, and now I was relegated to a hospital bed while my body struggled to hang on to this baby for just a few more precious weeks.  I turned to the scriptures, hoping to find answers to the questions that plagued me about the whys and hows of possibly having a very premature baby boy.  As I opened my scriptures, my eyes fell upon the story of Abraham and Sarah, who in their old age were told they would have a son after years of waiting and wanting a child.  This scripture in particular, caught my attention, Is any thing too hard for the Lord  At the time appointed I will return unto thee, according to the time of life, and Sarah shall have a son (Genesis 18:14). 

At that moment, I knew that God had granted me a tender mercy.  Some may say that I came upon this scripture by coincidence, but I knew that God was reassuring me that my son would be okay.  After being told by doctors and nurses for months that this probably would not be the case, I felt sweet relief.  I knew that God, as the ultimate "physician," would make things right.  To say that things after that were easy would be untrue.  Ryan was born at twenty-eight and a half weeks, weighing two pounds, eleven ounces.  He stayed in the hospital for 2 months and was in and out of the hospital for a year; however, I count him as one of my greatest miracles.  After a rough beginning, he is now married and living a productive, healthy life.  

Sometimes the Lord lets us know He is there in the smallest of ways, but those small tender mercies can change the course of our lives if we see them for what they are.  In the Book of Mormon, the prophet Nephi says, ". . . by small means the Lord can bring about great things." (1 Nephi 16:29)  However, if we look upon these "small means" as merely coincidences, then we may miss the "great" opportunities for growth that He has in store for us.  I have sat in many Sunday meetings feeling low and depressed for some reason or other, only to have a healing balm offered me through the talks or lessons that were given.  The words spoken seemed directed at my specific problems. Had I not seen these tender mercies as evidence that God loves me, I would have not grasped the hope that they offered me to move forward in faith.  

I know that God answers prayers.  I know that He often does so in quiet, simple ways. Life is not merely a series of meaningless acts or accidents but rather, it is a tapestry of acts that culminate in an exquisite divine plan (author unknown).

I have listed below some references to talks or articles about this subject.  I hope they will build your faith and knowledge that God is mindful of you.


After Four Hundred Names

Answers to Prayers or Coincidence?

The Tender Mercies of the Lord

Our True Identity

I think the greatest advice I can give my family is "Remember who you are!"  This video is a beautiful synopsis of what I mean.
https://www.lds.org/youth/video/our-true-identity?cid=HP_FR_1-15-2016_dPFD_fYTH_xLIDyI-1_&lang=eng

I am a Home Maker

About four months after I had my first child in 1987, I became a permanent "homemaker."  I was no longer able to fill out "Occupation" lines on documents with a fancy-titled career, nor was I able to come up with a sophisticated way to describe my new job as a mother with any of the dignified words used to describe other chosen careers.  When people asked questions like, "What do you do?" or "Where do you work?"  my simple answer to refer to a not-so-simple job was "I'm just a mom."  I have since removed the word "just" because it does not begin to give credibility to the incredible journey that motherhood is.  I have also decided that while I may have started out as a homemaker, I am now a Home Maker.  This is my job title.  After six kids, one dog, 2 frogs, multiple stunt hamsters (I call them this due to their miraculous ability to squeeze their way behind walls, only to be found days later--alive-- behind a wall outlet), I have learned that a mother has the power to make or break the atmosphere in her home.  When I think of a "homemaker," I picture a robe-wearing, unshowered-for-days woman, who has given control of her life over to her six offspring.  I think of my 20-30 something self.  However, to quote one of my favorite college professors, Marie Hafen, "Now, almost  twenty years later, I understand.  After all the diapers, the bruises, the washing, the cheering, the cleaning up, the pleading, the nail-biting, the crying, the laughing, the pacing, and the praying, I understand.  I feel about raising children the way Ammon [a Book of Mormon prophet] felt about missionary work: And this is the account of Ammon and his brethren, their journeyings in the land of Nephi, their sufferings in the land, their sorrows, and their afflictions, and their incomprehensible joy."

The Book of Mormon says of our struggles that the Lord "shall consecrate thine afflictions for thy gain." As I turn my life over to Him, I learn that there is a link between the depth of sorrows, toil and affliction that a mother feels and the depth of joy she feels in her life.  As I recognize the divine nature of my role as a mother, I realize the power that a woman's attitude, actions, and love have on the type of a home "made" for children.   I also recognize the enormous responsibility that I have to make choices that will proactively and positively affect those within my care.  While all but one of my children are now grown, I will always be their mother.  As a mother, I am a partner with God.  He made this earth as a home for me so that I could make a home for His children.  I am a Home Maker. It is a job title that is often misunderstood and underestimated by the world, but it is a job title I am proud of.

Motherhood

Sleeping soundly, so unaware,

So peaceful, soft, without a care. 

I pray each night you're safe and warm

From every day's encircling storm.

Some say this is no place to raise a child,

So small, so pure, so meek, so mild.

But me, I tend to disagree . . . 

This child, it seems, is raising me.

(Eliza Terry Roylance)

Begin

Let me begin by saying that I am not blogging as a way to misrepresent myself as someone whose life is filled with rainbows and butterflies.  While I do appreciate life's occasional rainbow and butterfly moments, life has a way of not letting me forget that the most beautiful rainbows come after the heaviest rains and that butterflies begin as slow, tedious, rather ugly worm-like creatures who must eek their way through myriads of larger-than-life obstacles in order to make impossible beauty, possible. Life is teaching me that "the most important things we can learn . . . are learned the slow way, through practice, through trial and error.  This kind of learning depends on opposition." (Hafen, Bruce C.: The Broken Heart:  Applying the Atonement to Life's Experiences)

Now, if you ask anyone who knows me well, I do not like "slow."  I want to learn things quickly so that I can move on and accomplish something else, but such is not the way of a truly productive, God-driven life.  As Robert Browning aptly puts it, "There is an answer to the passionate longing of the heart for fullness . . .:  live in all things outside yourself by love and you will have joy.  That is the life of God; it ought to be our life.  In Him it is accomplished and perfect; but in all created things, it is a lesson learned slowly against difficulty."  I am hoping that recording some of the slowly-learned lessons in my life will reinforce those lessons in my sometimes hard heart and head, but my greatest hope is that my family will be enlightened and simultaneously grow up with me.  I use the term family loosely because I have grown up believing that we are all brothers and sisters, created by a loving Heavenly Father who wants nothing more than for all of us to return home to Him.

I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints or Mormons, as we are typically called.  Much of what I share will of course be based on the deep faith I have in my Savior and His teachings.  Sometimes my posts might be a thought from a church leader or two, sometimes an insight that I have learned from hard experience or joyful triumph.  I am hoping that whatever I share will leave a small trail of light that will lead others to the source of all light--Jesus Christ.