Throughout my life I have had the opportunity of singing at many funerals. In fact, some have deemed me as the "funeral singer," a title which I hold dear to my heart. I have participated in the funerals for people I have not known well and funerals for those I love so deeply that I have had to completely rely on heaven's help to make it through the song. I usually sing whatever the family requests, but when the family does not have a request, my go-to numbers are "I Know that My Redeemer Lives" and "Consider the Lilies." I choose these songs because they give me an opportunity to bear testimony to broken-hearted family and friends that they are deeply and unconditionally loved by their heavenly family.
Today I was asked to sing at the funeral for Lorene Burns, a 94-year-old neighbor who has been ill off and on for many years. After the funeral, I felt prompted to write my feelings down.
I am a witness that miracles occur when loved ones honor their dead. No matter what the cause of death, no matter who the person is, God infuses funerals with a love so powerful that you can almost reach out and touch it. He takes advantage of open minds and hearts to touch our souls with His spirit, His love. Today was no different. As I stood up to sing, I saw Lorene's family and friends as God's children. I felt that He wanted them to receive the message that no matter where they are in life, He loves them and the Savior will always be there for them. As the words flowed from "Consider the Lilies," I felt God beseeching Lorene's family to find Him--that "though their paths may wind across the mountains, He knows the meadows where they feed." I felt personally empowered with His love to be the kind of person He expects me to be. I felt the miracle of God's love working through me. As in all funerals I have attended, no matter the circumstances or beliefs, the veil became so thin today that I felt unworldly emotions that I do not usually feel at any other time, except when I am in the temple. I became a witness that God loves His children. He is merciful to those who have wandered. He sends angels to lift those who are suffering. He changes hearts that need mending, and He is aware of us and wants us to find joy. His power can be keenly felt when we are remembering the goodness of a loved one whose spirit is still very much alive, despite the death of the body.
I am grateful for the spiritual glimpses that come when we remember and mourn the loss of a dear one. The undeniable warmth of the Spirit reminds us of a greater, higher power who can lift us above the sadness and drudgery of the world. We are gifted reassurance that God is waiting for us to come home to Him. There dawns in our hearts a hope that life and love extend beyond this existence. "For I am the resurrection and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live" (John 11:25).
My Family
About Me
- Andrea Nelson
- I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I start this blog in an effort to pass on the legacy of light that I have been blessed with because of the gospel of Jesus Christ to my children and their children. I hope that others will benefit as well.
Tuesday, February 28, 2017
Friday, February 17, 2017
To My Children and Grandchildren
I have not written on my blog for several months. I have been busy, but truthfully, more self-absorbed than I care to admit. As I watch my children grow up and leave home, a sense of anxiety has crept in, and I wonder if I have done enough as their mother. I also worry endlessly about the soul-wrenching problems that they are either dealing with now or will deal with in the future. I have agonized over my inability to come up with ways to help and advice to give because let's face it, only God has the answers to some questions, and sometimes he only reveals enough to lift the burden a little so that we can learn whatever it is we need to learn.
Despite these feelings of inadequacy, today I realized that the most important advice I can give to my children and their children concerns the choice all of us have to make in this life. It is advice that I have always tried to relay in many different forms. To quote Elder Boyd K. Packer: ...the choice of life is not between fame and obscurity, nor is the choice between wealth and poverty. The choice is between good and evil. When we finally understand this lesson, thereafter our happiness will not be determined by material things. We may be happy without them or successful in spite of them.
In other words, if we spend too much of our energy and time trying to figure out how to be more popular, more beautiful, more wealthy, etc., we will miss the point of this life. On the other hand, we may also be wasting energy and time wishing we had some or all of these things, thinking that our happiness depends on it, yet despairing that our particular problems will keep us from achieving that happiness. What we forget is that our problems, our weaknesses, our thorn[s] in the flesh, according to Paul's description, are means to an end. They are part of the lessons of life, part of the test. Some are tested by poor health, some by a body that is deformed or homely. Others are tested by handsome and healthy bodies; some by the passion of youth; others by the erosions of age. Some suffer disappointment in marriage and family problems; others live in poverty and obscurity. Some (perhaps this is the hardest test) find ease and luxury. All are part of the test and there is more equality in this testing than sometimes we suspect (Boyd K. Packer). The trick is to choose good over evil despite the problems that plague us and to remember that our worth is not determined by renown or by what we we own (Boyd K. Packer).
We are taught in The Book of Mormon that men are instructed sufficiently that they know good from evil, and men are free according to the flesh; and all things are given them which are expedient unto man (2 Nephi 2:5, 27). What a hopeful statement for struggling mortals! Despite our problems, we have everything we need to succeed and make the right choice!
What are we free to choose? The Book of Mormon answers this question clearly. We have but two options, and all of life's choices, big and little will ultimately lead us to one of these. We are free to choose:
1. Liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men.
OR
2. Captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil. (2 Nephi 2:27)
Our lives are made up of thousands of everyday choices. Over the years, these choices will be bundled together and show clearly what we value (Boyd K. Packer).
So I say to my children and grandchildren who will struggle with crises of identity and worth, who will wonder about what true success looks and feels like, who will feel like underdogs in a very competitive world: Be good. Study the gospel. Live it! Stay active in the Church. Receive the ordinances. Keep your covenants. I do not know at this moment whether you are learning, but I do know that what I am teaching is true (Boyd K. Packer).
To those who may think that their problems are too complex, too overwhelming to fall within the simplistic patterns described above, Elder Holland says:
I often think of those of you who are in the midst of a struggle. As much as we want life to be easy and comfortable, as much as I wish it could be that way for you, it simply cannot be. We are all, in one way or another, at one point in our lives, going to deal with a moral conundrum or a difficult issue without an easy answer.
At that point, we need to ask ourselves, "How much does the gospel of Jesus Christ really mean to me?" How will you act when that call comes? Will you defend Christ and His gospel, come what may?
John Taylor wrote that he once heard Joseph Smith say to the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, "You will have all kinds of trials to pass through. God will feel after you, and He will take hold of you and wrench your very heart strings, and if you cannot stand it, you will not be fit for an inheritance in the Celestial Kingdom of God."
The life of Christ was like that. It is not coincidental that the word that is used for Christ's experience in Gethsemane is that He was in "agony." If we say we're disciples of Christ, we will on occasion be in agony. We must walk where he walked.
When those moments come--contemporary issues, historical complexities, personal problems at home, challenges in a mission or a marriage, wherever it is--I pray and ask and bless you to the end that you will be strong. May you follow Christ with every ounce of your being in good times and in bad.
Choose Christ.
Much of what I have written comes from an excellent talk called The Choice, given by Boyd K. Packer in the October, 1980 General Conference. I would encourage you to read and study it.
"The Choice" by Boyd K. Packer
Despite these feelings of inadequacy, today I realized that the most important advice I can give to my children and their children concerns the choice all of us have to make in this life. It is advice that I have always tried to relay in many different forms. To quote Elder Boyd K. Packer: ...the choice of life is not between fame and obscurity, nor is the choice between wealth and poverty. The choice is between good and evil. When we finally understand this lesson, thereafter our happiness will not be determined by material things. We may be happy without them or successful in spite of them.
In other words, if we spend too much of our energy and time trying to figure out how to be more popular, more beautiful, more wealthy, etc., we will miss the point of this life. On the other hand, we may also be wasting energy and time wishing we had some or all of these things, thinking that our happiness depends on it, yet despairing that our particular problems will keep us from achieving that happiness. What we forget is that our problems, our weaknesses, our thorn[s] in the flesh, according to Paul's description, are means to an end. They are part of the lessons of life, part of the test. Some are tested by poor health, some by a body that is deformed or homely. Others are tested by handsome and healthy bodies; some by the passion of youth; others by the erosions of age. Some suffer disappointment in marriage and family problems; others live in poverty and obscurity. Some (perhaps this is the hardest test) find ease and luxury. All are part of the test and there is more equality in this testing than sometimes we suspect (Boyd K. Packer). The trick is to choose good over evil despite the problems that plague us and to remember that our worth is not determined by renown or by what we we own (Boyd K. Packer).
We are taught in The Book of Mormon that men are instructed sufficiently that they know good from evil, and men are free according to the flesh; and all things are given them which are expedient unto man (2 Nephi 2:5, 27). What a hopeful statement for struggling mortals! Despite our problems, we have everything we need to succeed and make the right choice!
What are we free to choose? The Book of Mormon answers this question clearly. We have but two options, and all of life's choices, big and little will ultimately lead us to one of these. We are free to choose:
1. Liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men.
OR
2. Captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil. (2 Nephi 2:27)
Our lives are made up of thousands of everyday choices. Over the years, these choices will be bundled together and show clearly what we value (Boyd K. Packer).
So I say to my children and grandchildren who will struggle with crises of identity and worth, who will wonder about what true success looks and feels like, who will feel like underdogs in a very competitive world: Be good. Study the gospel. Live it! Stay active in the Church. Receive the ordinances. Keep your covenants. I do not know at this moment whether you are learning, but I do know that what I am teaching is true (Boyd K. Packer).
To those who may think that their problems are too complex, too overwhelming to fall within the simplistic patterns described above, Elder Holland says:
I often think of those of you who are in the midst of a struggle. As much as we want life to be easy and comfortable, as much as I wish it could be that way for you, it simply cannot be. We are all, in one way or another, at one point in our lives, going to deal with a moral conundrum or a difficult issue without an easy answer.
At that point, we need to ask ourselves, "How much does the gospel of Jesus Christ really mean to me?" How will you act when that call comes? Will you defend Christ and His gospel, come what may?
John Taylor wrote that he once heard Joseph Smith say to the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, "You will have all kinds of trials to pass through. God will feel after you, and He will take hold of you and wrench your very heart strings, and if you cannot stand it, you will not be fit for an inheritance in the Celestial Kingdom of God."
The life of Christ was like that. It is not coincidental that the word that is used for Christ's experience in Gethsemane is that He was in "agony." If we say we're disciples of Christ, we will on occasion be in agony. We must walk where he walked.
When those moments come--contemporary issues, historical complexities, personal problems at home, challenges in a mission or a marriage, wherever it is--I pray and ask and bless you to the end that you will be strong. May you follow Christ with every ounce of your being in good times and in bad.
Choose Christ.
Much of what I have written comes from an excellent talk called The Choice, given by Boyd K. Packer in the October, 1980 General Conference. I would encourage you to read and study it.
"The Choice" by Boyd K. Packer
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