Broken Things to Mend

In Nazareth, the narrow road,

That tires the feet and steals the breath,

Passes the place where once abode 

The Carpenter of Nazareth.

And up and down the dusty way

The village folk would often wend;

And on the bench, beside Him, lay

Their broken things for Him to mend.

The Maiden with the doll she broke,

The woman with the broken chair,

The man with broken plough, or yoke,

Said, “Can you mend it, Carpenter?”

And each received the thing he sought,

In yoke, or plough, or chair, or doll;

The broken thing which each had brought 

Returned again a perfect whole.

So up the hill the long years through,

With heavy step and wistful eye,

The burdened souls their way pursue,

Uttering each the plaintive cry:

“O Carpenter of Nazareth,

This heart, that’s broken past repair,

This life, that’s shattered night to death,

Oh, can You mend them Carpenter?”

And by His kind and ready hand,

His own sweet life is woven through

Our broken lives, until they stand

A New Creation—“all things new.”

“The shattered [substance] of [the] heart,

Desire, ambition, hope, and faith,

Mould Thou into the perfect part,

O, Carpenter of Nazareth!”

--Elder Jeffrey R. Holland (Broken Things to Mend, April LDS General Conference, 2006)

Go On

Found this poem today and wanted to share:

When you come to the Red Sea place in your life
In spite of all you can do
There is no way back, there is no way round
There is no way but through
Then know God with a soul serene 
And the dark and the storm are gone
God stills the wind
God stills the waves
God says to your soul "Go on"

--Baird T. Spalding

Help Thou My Unbelief (Mark 9:17-27)

Part of the promise of the Atonement is the blessing that comes after all we can do.  When we are not enough, Christ can make up the difference.  But we have to ask Heavenly Father, in the name of Christ, for the added strength.  For drawing closer to Christ is not an event but a process. As we walk along that trail, we will find not only that Christ is aware of our limitations but that, after all we can do, He will compensate for them.  The sense of falling short or falling down is a natural part of each of our lives.  But we need to believe that after all we can do, Christ can fill that which is empty, straighten our bent parts, and make strong that which is weak (Freeman, Emily; 21 Days Closer to Christ).

Mark 9:17-27 relates the poignant story of a man whose son has been suffering with a horrible malady that has racked his body and soul since he was a child.  The man has enough faith to approach Christ's disciples to ask for help.  He hopes they hold the power to heal his son; however, they are not spiritually prepared to answer such a daunting request (see Mark 9:28-29).  He then continues his efforts on behalf of his son by approaching the Savior.  The pleading of this man, the way he describes his child's suffering, and what happens next melts my mother heart as I think of times when I have sought the Savior's blessings on behalf of my own children in the midst of their sufferings.

17 And one of the multitude answered and said, Master, I have brought unto thee my son, which hath a dumb spirit;

18 And wheresoever he taketh him, he teareth him: and he foameth, and gnasheth with his teeth, and pineth away: and I spake to thy disciples that they should cast him out; and they could not.

19 He answereth him, and saith, O faithless generation, how long shall I be with you? how long shall I suffer you? bring him unto me.

20 And they brought him unto him: and when he saw him, straightway the spirit tare him; and he fell on the ground, and wallowed foaming.

21 And he asked his father, How long is it ago since this came unto him? And he said, Of a child.

22 And ofttimes it hath cast him into the fire, and into the waters, to destroy him: but if thou canst do any thing, have compassion on us, and help us.

23 Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth

24 And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.

25 When Jesus saw that the people came running together, he rebuked the foul spirit saying unto him, Thou dumb and deaf spirit, I charge thee, come out of him, and enter no more into him.

26 And the spirit cried, and rent him sore, and came out of him: and he was as one dead; insomuch that many said, He is dead.

27 But Jesus took him by the hand, and lifted him up; and he arose 

Tears came to my eyes today as I read this heart-wrenching account of a humble parent desperately seeking a miracle from a source that he hoped had the power to give it.  He believed enough to ask, and that belief grew into faith as he turned his son over to Christ.  After hearing this father's humble plea for compassion, Jesus makes a statement that can apply to all of us, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth.  

I picture the Savior standing eye-to-eye with this tormented father, piercing his broken heart with love and understanding.  Perhaps this good man felt that his seed of faith was not enough, that he needed Christ to help him overcome his lingering doubts; thus, his emotional outcry,  Lord, I believe; help thou my unbelief.  The Savior's answer came in the form of this man's sought after miracle.  His child was healed, and "Jesus took him by the hand and lifted him up."  

I believe that this lifting up was not only manifest in the physical change that took place in the son, but in the spiritual strengthening of the father's faith in the Son of God.  What miracles could take place in my life if I were to ask God each day to "help thou my unbelief" in areas where I feel I am lacking?  I plan on finding out! 

Let Go and Let God

     Today in my studies, I came across this quote by C.S. Lewis.  You may have heard it before, but it is a reminder worth reading again.  

      Imagine yourself as a living house.  God comes in to rebuild that house.  At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing.  He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on:  you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised.  But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense.  What on earth is He up to?  The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of—throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards.  You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage:  but He is building a palace. . . .

The command “Be ye perfect” is not idealistic gas.  Nor is it a command to do the impossible.  He is going to make us into creatures that can obey that command.  He said (in the Bible) that we were “gods” and He is going to make good His words.  If we let Him—for we can prevent Him, if we choose—He will make the feeblest and filthiest of us into a god or goddess, dazzling, radiant, immortal creature, pulsating all through with such energy and joy and wisdom and love as we cannot now imagine. . . .  The process will be long and in parts very painful; but that is what we are in for.  Nothing less.  He meant what He said.”

Jesus Has Rules

I came across the following story today from the book, Worth the Wrestle, by Sheri Dew.  I loved its message so much that I decided to share it on my blog.

A friend who teaches preschool related a conversation she had with a boy in her preschool class.  From the beginning of the school year, this teacher noticed how kind this boy was.  He was "all boy" during recess, but kind and considerate to everyone in the classroom.  One day she pulled him aside and said, "Brandon, you are such a good member of this class.  Why are you so kind to everyone?"

His immediate response was a matter-of-fact:  "Because Jesus has rules."

Trying to contain her grin, the teacher probed further.  "What does that mean?"

He responded without hesitating:  "If we want Jesus to help us, we have to follow His rules."

My friend concluded, "There you have it, the secret of a great life reduced to two sentences by a four-year-old."

Crossing the Great Waters

I have been reading the book, More than a Tattooed Mormon, by Al Caraway, a convert to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  In the chapter entitled, New Life, she describes the difficulties of being rejected by those whom she had loved because of her new-found faith and the trials that followed her baptism.  She turned to God and the scriptures for strength and peace.  I was impressed that she turned to God instead of away from Him during her times of great loneliness and heartache.  She took her "Why" questions to Him--an example we can all learn from.

At the end of this chapter, she compares the story of the people of Jared to her own journey (Ether 6:1-12, Book of Mormon).  As I studied and applied these scriptures and her words to my own life, I gained some amazing insights.  The scriptures truly are for us and can help us face our challenges.  Ether 6 provides us with perspective when we find ourselves wondering why our particular heartaches and struggles continue for what seems like forever, or why we have to deal with them at all.  The story relates the journey of Jared and his brother and their families as they traveled across the sea to this continent--their promised land.  It is a story of faith, as they built ships according to the specifications that the Lord had given them--ships that would withstand the dark, suffocating waters of the ocean.  They were described as "vessels being tight like unto a dish," so that no water could get in, even when they were "buried in the deep."

Often in the scriptures, the Lord describes people as "vessels."  As I read this chapter, I feel a desire to make sure that my vessel is tight, sealed with faith in Christ, so that the influences of the world cannot not affect my spirit.  I wonder how I can help my children and grandchildren seal their vessels against the powerful influences of the outside world on this journey that God requires of us in order to reach a better place.

The journey for the Jaredites was long and fraught with storms and a furious wind, and yet the Lord did not leave them without light.  Miraculous stones of light were provided for each end of each vessel, so that even when they were buried in the deep, they could still see the light.  And thus the Lord caused stones to shine in darkness, to give light unto men, women, and children, that they might not cross the great waters in darkness (verse 3).  I love that this scripture does not just say people.  I feel like God is telling us that he cares about the needs of men, women, and children--that one group does not dominate another or have more status in the eyes of God.  I feel like He is talking to me, letting me know that I do not have to cross my own great waters or face the dark depths of suffering or great and terrible tempests without His continuous light, that even though mountain waves may break upon me, they will not break me, as long as my vessel, my spirit, remains tight.

I love what Al Caraway states about this chapter:  Not once were they left alone.  And though the storm seemed to be preventing them from progressing, it was actually helping them travel toward the place they needed to go--the promised land (verse 8).  So it is with the many struggles we face on our journey.  Sometimes the very things we wish would just go away are actually leading us to a better place.

These people acted on their faith. They got into their vessels.  They faced the monsters of the sea and  made it to a place that God had prepared--a place that was so much better than what they had left behind.

Why were they successful under nearly impossible circumstances?

• They acted in faith and did what God told them to do.  They built their ship and formed it the way He wanted it built.
• After they had done all that they could do, they commended themselves unto the Lord their God  (verse 4).  
• They prayed continually:  . . . therefore, when they were encompassed about by many waters they did cry unto the Lord, and he did bring them forth again upon the top of the waters (verse 7).
• They showed gratitude:  . . . they did sing praises unto the Lord; yea, the brother of Jared did sing praises unto the Lord, and he did thank and praise the Lord all the day long; and when the night came, they did not cease to praise the Lord (verse 9).
• They were humble and acknowledged the hand of God in their lives:  and when they had set their feet upon the shores of the promised land they bowed themselves down upon the face of the land, and did humble themselves before the Lord, and did shed tears of joy before the Lord, because of the multitude of his tender mercies over them (verse 12).

In all of the discouragement you may feel now--all of your sorrow, sadness, loneliness, darkness, and "storms" of life you may be traveling through right now--look to this story.  Look to the light you do have, even if it seems as small as a stone.  Look to the Lord.  Look for His hand, even when you feel buried under the waves of mortality.  He is always there with you, always guiding you.  We need to trust that everything God does is to help us receive greater blessings in life.  When you are trying to do what God will have you do, know that those hard times are moving you closer to where He needs you to be.  Our trials move us closer to where things are greater than they ever could have been before.  Your stormy journey may be taking much longer than you desire or feel you have strength the endure, but do not let discouragement stop you from trying and turning to Him.  Hard times will consistently be there--that won't change--but so will Christ.  And with Him we are able to overcome and conquer absolutely everything--every feeling of loneliness, discomfort, weakness, sadness, and temptation. Do not let your trials dictate and alter your perception of truths and promises given.  Hold on to what you know; it will be your anchor in the storms.  He will never give up on you.  Do not give up on Him"  (Al Carraway).

Faith in Jesus Christ

I learned some powerful lessons yesterday as I studied the concept of faith.  I looked up "faith" in the Bible dictionary and studied Hebrews 11.  My daughter encouraged me to publish my thoughts on my blog after I shared them in a letter to my family.  So here goes!

Lately, I have been pondering and studying the principle of faith.  I think I have always believed that my faith should somehow make it so that God would take away suffering when it becomes too painful, or that my faith should be rewarded sooner rather than later, that I should receive constant reassurance that the decisions I am making are right.  While this might sometimes be the case, this is not the purpose of faith.  Today I had a powerful spiritual experience.  I decided to study the Bible Dictionary’s definition of faith, which led me to Hebrews 11.  I have read this chapter before, but never had the power of its message hit me like it did today.  This chapter is a commentary on faith.  I have learned today after studying and pondering it why faith is the first principle of the gospel of Jesus Christ.  Article of Faith number 4 does not just say “Faith,” it says, “First, faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.”  Actionable faith must be based on our belief in Jesus Christ.  In order to receive the gift of faith in our lives, we have to recognize Christ’s essential role in our lives and then obey Him like our lives depend on it because they do.

I would encourage you to study the Bible Dictionary’s definition of faith and read the scriptures that go along with it.  You will find that faith is a principle of action and power.  We can have faith and confidence in anything we choose to, but if we don’t have faith in Jesus Christ, our faith will not produce salvation.  Because of the way He lived, because of His perfect character and the attributes He exemplified, we can “place confidence in Him without reservation.”  Faith is work.  It begins by hearing God’s word.  It continues by acting up it.

I have noticed in my study that answers to prayer, even by great men, did not come easy to them.  Some describe themselves as “wrestling” with God to describe their labor-intensive prayers as they sought for His answers and His help.  As I study their “wrestle” (The Book of Mormon, Alma 8:10 and Enos 1), I am learning that engaging God requires an intense desire or hunger for help, answers, forgiveness, or whatever it is we desire from Him.  I have learned that answers take time (Enos 1:4).  I have learned that we must seek repentance before clear answers can come.  I have learned that as we engage God with all of our faculties (our heart, might, mind, and strength), we can feel a wholeness that we otherwise would not have known or understood (Enos 1:8).  If we have faith (even the smallest desire), then we must wrestle, and as we wrestle, our faith grows.  There are many instances in the scriptures where Christ refers to faith.  He wants us to know that we have an active part to play in our “wholeness,” that it takes both our active engagement of Him and the gift of His grace to improve, draw closer to Him, and ultimately achieve eternal life.  As He said to the women who was healed after just barely touching His robe, “They faith hath made thee whole,” so it can be for us.

Hebrews 11 reaffirms this “wrestle.”  Today I gained a greater understanding of the great struggle that good men and women throughout history have had to endure in order to grow and stand strong in their faith.  I have learned that we cannot assume that because we have faith, our lives will be and should be easier.  I have learned the true meaning of Elder Uchtdorf’s quote, “Doubt your doubts and not your faith.”  If our faith centers on Jesus Christ, we have no reason to doubt Him.  He has not given us one.   It follows then, that obedience to His commandments, to His gospel, should be the way we exercise and strengthen our faith. 

Please read and ponder Hebrews 11, making sure that you read the Joseph Smith Translation of verse 40.  As you read about the examples of faithful people, apply their experiences to your own lives.

Listed below are some powerful principles and lessons that this chapter taught me:

• Faith is a principle of obedience.  There will be times in our lives when faith requires us to obey God without knowing where that obedience will lead.  Abraham provided a beautiful example of this when he was called by God to go to a strange land and he “obeyed, and he went out, not knowing whither he went.”  Sometimes we are led to paths in our lives by God that may seem strange or uncomfortable for us at first, only to find out that He has led us to something better for us than we could have imagined.  In some cases, we may not find this out until after this life is over.
• Ultimately our faith will require us to “forsake Egypt,” whatever sinful behavior or worldly attitude that might mean for us.
• Faith means, “esteeming the reproach of Christ” as more important than “the treasure of Egypt” (or the world).
• Faith sometimes requires us to choose to “suffer affliction with the people of God” rather than “enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season.”
• None of the people referred to in this chapter had easy lives by any stretch of the imagination.  The more they acted according to their faith in Christ, the more they felt like “strangers and pilgrims on the earth.”  They sought a country that could not be found here.  They felt desire for “a better country, that is an heavenly” place prepared for the faithful after this faith-building experience we call earth life is over.  Faith is meant to propel us to hope for a better life to come so that we don’t focus too much on the pleasures and pain of this one.
• Even Joseph Smith, who obviously had incredible faith, was stretched to the limits of his physical and mental capacity, and he, like so many of the faithful people described in this chapter, died in faith, without seeing the fruits of their steadfast faith.
• We do not receive the full blessings of faith in this life.  Faith requires patience and hope.  Prophets throughout the scriptures saw the blessings and promises of their faith “afar off, and were persuaded of them, and embraced them,” without receiving the full promises and blessings in their lifetime, and yet they still remained true to their faith in Jesus Christ. 
• Faith requires us to give our lives to God in such a way that we are willing to sacrifice anything He requires of us.
• Having faith means forsaking what is comfortable, natural, or worldly.
• Faith means not following the visible societal trends around us, but instead “seeing Him who is invisible.”  It is seeing, feeling, and doing what our heart feels and knows is right without having to see it with our eyes.
• When I came to the reference to the parting of the Red Sea, a question popped into my mind.  What are the Red Seas in my life that I have to part in order to pass over to God’s side and become more like Christ?  What is keeping me from Him?
• When I came to the account of the walls of Jericho, I thought, what walls do I need God to tear down for me and how much faith-filled effort am I willing to give in order to obtain this blessing?
• Sometimes the rewards of our faith are evident but sometimes we must suffer in order to continue faithful.  Verse 35:  “By faith . . . women received their dead raised to life again:  and others were tortured, not accepting deliverance, that they might obtain a better resurrection . . ."
• We cannot assume that because we have faith our lives will be and should be easier.  Faith gives us the strength to endure hard things, and sometimes it is because we choose to stand as a witness of our faith that others use their agency to cause us suffering.  One who has the power of faith is consistently striving to transform his/her character to the point where he/she could not deny their belief and hope in Christ.  Their desire for heavenly blessings precludes all worldly comfort, accolades, and pleasures.  Their faith is transforming their character in such a way that they are willing to endure sufferings in order to remain true to their God.
• Sometimes we get so upset with God that our faith isn’t “rewarded” immediately.  We forget that true faith means faith in Christ, that He understands us, that He will help us, and that ultimately, if not in this life, then when this life is over, He will deliver us.  Faith is the actionable reassurance that this earth life is but a means to an end.
• How can I be so small minded as to think that I can receive the blessings of eternity, the blessings of Christ, without also knowing that if He, a perfect man, was required to suffer because of his “faith,” why wouldn’t I be as well.  Faith molds us into perfect vessels of the Lord.
• The Joseph Smith translation of the last verse (40) reads:  “God having provided some better things for them through their sufferings, for without sufferings they could not be made perfect.”  This pretty much gives us the answer as to why good, faithful people still suffer in this life.
•  Faith goes against the grain of the world.  The more faith we obtain through our faithful obedience, the more “homeless” and often uncomfortable we feel with the world we live in (verses 37-38).
• God wants us to increase our faith not so that we can be happier in this life (although this is often the result).  He wants us to increase our faith so that we can have joy in the next life.
• “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me” (Philippians 4:13).  We need faith in Christ because life is hard, and while having faith does not necessarily change our circumstances, it allows Christ to give us the strength and power to deal with them.

I hope you will study the things I have referred to.  They have changed the way I feel about the essential role of faith in Christ.  They have increased my sense of urgency to establish my priorities to match my faith.  I would also recommend reading, “The Transforming Power of Faith and Character” by Richard G. Scott, from the October 2010 General Conference.    

The Transforming Power of Faith and Character

Pushing the Wind

Today, I went for a bike ride on my usual route, but felt myself being pushed back by the wind.  It has been a hard week, and this seemed to be nature's response.  Then the lessons began.  As I shifted gears, I thought about how when trials threaten to immobilize our forward progress, we sometimes have to shift down and slow down, but we must never stop pedaling forward.  While we sometimes don't feel like we are moving, the scenery changes verify that we are.  It is even okay to stop and take a break, as long as we get back on the bike.  We can't ignore the wind, but we can adjust to it.

Sometimes another rider might be just ahead of us, and we can use their draft to ease our own burden.  I have many people on this side of the veil and on the other who have drafted me forward, dragging me along as they push the wind for me.  I am so grateful for them.  Thanks to them and to my Savior, I know that I am never alone.

Today, there were many times when I felt like turning around, not wanting to push the wind anymore, but I kept pedaling until I reached my destination.  In life, I am determined to do the same.  Thankfully, when it was time to go home, the wind was blowing in my direction, pushing me forward and allowing me a respite from the uphill battle.  Such it is with life.  Our problems and trials will eventually serve as means to an end, they will push us home.  They will lift us to stronger, more determined, exhilarating heights and help us become conquerors of darkness and partakers of joy.

The Funeral Singer

Throughout my life I have had the opportunity of singing at many funerals.  In fact, some have deemed me as the "funeral singer," a title which I hold dear to my heart.  I have participated in the funerals for people I have not known well and funerals for those I love so deeply that I have had to completely rely on heaven's help to make it through the song.  I usually sing whatever the family requests, but when the family does not have a request, my go-to numbers are "I Know that My Redeemer Lives" and "Consider the Lilies."  I choose these songs because they give me an opportunity to bear testimony to broken-hearted family and friends that they are deeply and unconditionally loved by their heavenly family.

Today I was asked to sing at the funeral for Lorene Burns, a 94-year-old neighbor who has been ill off and on for many years.  After the funeral, I felt prompted to write my feelings down.

I am a witness that miracles occur when loved ones honor their dead.  No matter what the cause of death, no matter who the person is, God infuses funerals with a love so powerful that you can almost reach out and touch it.  He takes advantage of open minds and hearts to touch our souls with His spirit, His love.  Today was no different.  As I stood up to sing, I saw Lorene's family and friends as God's children.  I felt that He wanted them to receive the message that no matter where they are in life, He loves them and the Savior will always be there for them.  As the words flowed from "Consider the Lilies," I felt God beseeching Lorene's family to find Him--that "though their paths may wind across the mountains, He knows the meadows where they feed."  I felt personally empowered with His love to be the kind of person He expects me to be.  I felt the miracle of God's love working through me.  As in all funerals I have attended, no matter the circumstances or beliefs, the veil became so thin today that I felt unworldly emotions that I do not usually feel at any other time, except when I am in the temple.  I became a witness that God loves His children.  He is merciful to those who have wandered.  He sends angels to lift those who are suffering.  He changes hearts that need mending, and He is aware of us and wants us to find joy.  His power can be keenly felt when we are remembering the goodness of a loved one whose spirit is still very much alive, despite the death of the body.

 I am grateful for the spiritual glimpses that come when we remember and mourn the loss of a dear one.  The undeniable warmth of the Spirit reminds us of a greater, higher power who can lift us above the sadness and drudgery of the world.  We are gifted reassurance that God is waiting for us to come home to Him.  There dawns in our hearts a hope that life and love extend beyond this existence.  "For I am the resurrection and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live" (John 11:25).

To My Children and Grandchildren

I have not written on my blog for several months.  I have been busy, but truthfully, more self-absorbed than I care to admit.  As I watch my children grow up and leave home, a sense of anxiety has crept in, and I wonder if I have done enough as their mother.  I also worry endlessly about the soul-wrenching problems that they are either dealing with now or will deal with in the future.  I have agonized over my inability to come up with ways to help and advice to give because let's face it, only God has the answers to some questions, and sometimes he only reveals enough to lift the burden a little so that we can learn whatever it is we need to learn.

Despite these feelings of inadequacy, today I realized that the most important advice I can give to my children and their children concerns the choice all of us have to make in this life.  It is advice that I have always tried to relay in many different forms.  To quote Elder Boyd K. Packer:  ...the choice of life is not between fame and obscurity, nor is the choice between wealth and poverty.  The choice is between good and evil.  When we finally understand this lesson, thereafter our happiness will not be determined by material things.  We may be happy without them or successful in spite of them.

In other words, if we spend too much of our energy and time trying to figure out how to be more popular, more beautiful, more wealthy, etc., we will miss the point of this life.  On the other hand, we may also be wasting energy and time wishing we had some or all of these things, thinking that our happiness depends on it, yet despairing that our particular problems will keep us from achieving that happiness.  What we forget is that our problems, our weaknesses, our thorn[s] in the flesh, according to Paul's description, are means to an end.  They are part of the lessons of life, part of the test.  Some are tested by poor health, some by a body that is deformed or homely.  Others are tested by handsome and healthy bodies; some by the passion of youth; others by the erosions of age.  Some suffer disappointment in marriage and family problems; others live in poverty and obscurity. Some (perhaps this is the hardest test) find ease and luxury.  All are part of the test and there is more equality in this testing than sometimes we suspect (Boyd K. Packer).  The trick is to choose good over evil despite the problems that plague us and to remember that our worth is not determined by renown or by what we we own (Boyd K. Packer).

We are taught in The Book of Mormon that men are instructed sufficiently that they know good from evil, and men are free according to the flesh; and all things are given them which are expedient unto man (2 Nephi 2:5, 27).  What a hopeful statement for struggling mortals!  Despite our problems, we have everything we need to succeed and make the right choice!

What are we free to choose?  The Book of Mormon answers this question clearly.  We have but two options, and all of life's choices, big and little will ultimately lead us to one of these.  We are free to choose:
1.  Liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men.
                                                            OR
2.  Captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil.  (2 Nephi 2:27)

Our lives are made up of thousands of everyday choices.  Over the years, these choices will be bundled together and show clearly what we value (Boyd K. Packer).

So I say to my children and grandchildren who will struggle with crises of identity and worth, who will wonder about what true success looks and feels like, who will feel like underdogs in a very competitive world:  Be good.  Study the gospel.  Live it! Stay active in the Church.  Receive the ordinances. Keep your covenants.  I do not know at this moment whether you are learning, but I do know that what I am teaching is true (Boyd K. Packer).

To those who may think that their problems are too complex, too overwhelming to fall within the simplistic patterns described above, Elder Holland says:
      I often think of those of you who are in the midst of a struggle.  As much as we want life to be easy and comfortable, as much as I wish it could be that way for you, it simply cannot be.  We are all, in one way or another, at one point in our lives, going to deal with a moral conundrum or a difficult issue without an easy answer.  
     At that point, we need to ask ourselves, "How much does the gospel of Jesus Christ really mean to me?"  How will you act when that call comes?  Will you defend Christ and His gospel, come what may?
     John Taylor wrote that he once heard Joseph Smith say to the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, "You will have all kinds of trials to pass through.  God will feel after you, and He will take hold of you and wrench your very heart strings, and if you cannot stand it, you will not be fit for an inheritance in the Celestial Kingdom of God."
     The life of Christ was like that.  It is not coincidental that the word that is used for Christ's experience in Gethsemane is that He was in "agony."  If we say we're disciples of Christ, we will on occasion be in agony.  We must walk where he walked.
     When those moments come--contemporary issues, historical complexities, personal problems at home, challenges in a mission or a marriage, wherever it is--I pray and ask and bless you to the end that you will be strong.  May you follow Christ with every ounce of your being in good times and in bad.

Choose Christ.

Much of what I have written comes from an excellent talk called The Choice, given by Boyd K. Packer in the October, 1980 General Conference.  I would encourage you to read and study it.
"The Choice" by Boyd K. Packer

The Proof is in the Pudding

I just finished reading The Book of Mormon, Another Testament of Jesus Christ.  This wasn't my first time through, nor will it be my last.  The incredible insights and gems of wisdom I get from it change with each reading.  This time, as I was finishing the last chapter and feeling the familiar stirrings of truth in my heart, these words popped into my head:  The proof is in the pudding.  I then referred back to a verse I had just read in Moroni, Chapter 10, Verse 6:  And whatsoever thing is good is just and true; wherefore, nothing that is good denieth the Christ, but acknowledgeth that he is.  Makes complete sense, right!  I then looked up the pudding phrase.  The Urban Dictionary says that the phrase is a shortened version of an older adage, The proof of the pudding is in the eating.  In other words, if you want to know if something is good, eat it.  Explore the evidence!  If you do this with The Book of Mormon, you will find that it does lead inquiring souls to Christ, and it only makes sense that something that leads us to Christ is good.

During the summer of 1985, after my first year of college, I had the opportunity of participating in The Hill Cumorah Pageant in Palmyra, New York.  This pageant portrays highlights from The Book of Mormon against the backdrop of the hill where the record was found by Joseph Smith, the translator of the book.  Before the pageant would begin each night, the cast welcomed visitors and talked to them about the history of the book.  For the most part, we were greeted kindly--sometimes with interest, sometimes not.  However, one particular evening, we ran into a group of people who had not come to find the proof in the pudding but to discredit the pudding itself.  We were told that we had been brainwashed into believing in The Book of Mormon from the time that we were young. They actually felt sorry for us and tried to convince us that we had been deceived.  I asked them if they had read the book, and I was not surprised to hear that they had not.  In fact, their minister had strongly advised against it, saying that the book was evil.  In a spirit of love, I urged them to find out for themselves by reading it, but their minds were closed.  I had read the book.  I had prayed about it and knew of the true principles it contained.  I felt like I was a better person for having read it.  I had found the proof I needed to know that it was good pudding.  However, I could not force someone to pick up the spoon and taste it.  I felt disheartened and sad that something so dear to me was judged and sentenced before it was even put to the test.

I urge those of you who read this blog to pick up your spoons and taste this book with open minds and hearts.  Put the promise at the end of the book to the test:  And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal father in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you by the power of the Holy Ghost (Moroni 10:4).  Find out of the pudding is delicious by examining the evidence.

I testify that The Book of Mormon is the word of God.  This book has shaped the course of my life for the better.  How can a book that exhorts its readers to come unto Christ, and be perfected in him be anything but good?  Don't take my word for it!  Read it!

"God Will Use You, God Will Bless You"

As I was working in the kitchen today, I turned on BYU TV and listened to an amazing talk by Elder Dean M. Davies, given at a BYU devotional in November, 2015.  The talk is called God Will Use You, God Will Bless You.  It is no coincidence that I turned on the TV at just the right moment to hear this talk.  I attended the temple last night, praying that my children would be directed by the Lord in the decisions they are making in their lives.  Some have expressed concern and confusion about making the big decisions that are looming on their horizons.  This talk gives reassuring comfort and advice, reminding us that the Lord is at the helm and will guide us as long as we are striving to follow his commandments.

Here is the link:  God Will Use You, God Will Bless You

Enjoy!

Zero Fatalities

I was profoundly affected by the messages that I heard in our stake conference this weekend.  In the Saturday evening meeting, our stake president, President Timothy Taylor, spoke on a topic that I have taken the liberty to call, "Zero Fatalities."  I have also taken the license of mixing his words with mine.  I hope he won't mind.

As a traffic engineer, he receives reports from the Utah Department of Transportation about the deaths on Utah roads.  There have been over 200 deaths on the roads this year and of those, over 80 were the result of the victims not wearing a seat belt.  UDOT's zero fatality goal emphasizes the question, "How many deaths are acceptable?"  and in an even more personal way, "How many deaths are acceptable in your family?"  Of course, the answer is an emphatic zero; hence, the "Zero Fatality" slogan.

The question that came into my mind as our president spoke was, "How many spiritual deaths are acceptable in my family?"  To illustrate, he told the true story of a young man who wanted to spend the night at a friend's house.  He called his parents for permission, but they wanted him to come home by his curfew of 12:00 am.  When 12:15 rolled around and her son had not yet returned home, the mother became worried and started to drive the route that her son would have taken home.  After driving for a few minutes, she saw a police car pass her with his lights on, and shortly after that, she came upon the scene of a horrible accident and saw the family car in the middle of a field.  Her son had swerved to miss a deer and had rolled the car.  Because he was not wearing his seat belt, he was ejected and the car rolled on top of him.  Her wonderful son, who was known for always wearing his seat belt, had, for whatever reason, not put it on that night and had lost his life as a result.  In his case and many others, it did not matter that he had worn his seat belt all of the previous times.  What mattered was the decision to leave it off that night.

Like seat belts that keep us physically safe when we choose to wear them, we can develop small and simple habits that will keep us spiritually safe if we practice them--not sometimes, not most of the time, but always.  Here is another rhetorical example that illustrates the importance of developing habits that maintain our spiritual health.

Eating is an "always" activity.  Our bodies get hungry and we eat.  What if we chose not to eat?  Someone might ask us why we are looking so sickly and thin.  We might answer, "Oh, I eat most of the time but sometimes I don't because I just don't have the time, and eating is so boring.  It's just the same thing over and over again--put something in your mouth and chew it up."  Of course, this answer is nonsensical.  Yet, how often do we use these excuses for the spiritual essentials in our lives?  Just like "most of the time" cannot and should not exist when it comes to "always" activities like eating and seat belts, it should not exist for things that contribute to our spiritual health.

Why, when we are crying out for peace in much the same way that our bodies cry out for food, why are we not ALWAYS doing the things that will bring us peace?  Like eating and seat-belt wearing, the following spiritual essentials need to become fundamental habits:  family home evening, family and personal prayer, family and personal scripture study, and regular temple attendance.  As we do these things on a regular basis, we should remember that "always" is less about the quantity or the time we spend each day and more about the quality of how we do them.  They should deepen our relationship with and understanding of our Heavenly Father and His son, Jesus Christ.

God is an "always" God and we must be "always" Saints--not "most of the time" Saints.  If we are doing the small and simple spiritual essentials most of the time, then we will receive the help that we seek and need from God most of the time.  I don't know about you, but I want and desperately need that help all of the time, as I seek to keep myself and those I love from becoming spiritual fatalities.

There is a great promise found in the Book of Mormon to those who always build their foundations on these small and simple essentials: And now, my sons, remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall (Helaman 5:12).

Only One Needful Thing

I have been so busy over the past month that I have neglected my blog, but today I came across a thought-provoking article by Patricia T. Holland that is a must-read for every woman.  I thought about paraphrasing it and adding some words of my own in an effort to not cop out on writing today, but I cannot do justice to what she writes.  Hopefully, the following paragraph from the article will tantalize you to read more:

We must have the courage to be imperfect while striving for perfection.  We must not allow our own guilt, the feminist books, the talk-show hosts, or the whole media culture to sell us a bill of goods--or rather a bill of no goods.  We can become so sidetracked in our compulsive search for identity and self-esteem that we really believe it can be found in having perfect figures or academic degrees or professional status or even absolute motherly success.  Yet, in so searching externally, we can be torn from our true internal, eternal selves.  We often worry so much about pleasing and performing for others that we lose our uniqueness--that full and relaxed acceptance of one's self as a person of worth and individuality.  We become so frightened and insecure that we cannot be generous toward the diversity and individuality, and yes, problems of our neighbors.  Too many women with these anxieties watch helplessly as their lives unravel from the very core that centers and sustains them.  Too many are like a ship at sea without sail or rudder, "tossed to and fro," as the Apostle Paul said, until more and more of us are genuinely, rail-grabbingly seasick."

Click on this link to read the rest of the article:  
"One Thing Needful": Becoming Women of Greater Faith in Christ

Small and Simple

. . . by small and simple things are great things brought to pass; and small means in many instances doth confound the wise (The Book of Mormon, Alma 37:6).

It is interesting to me that the smallest organisms created by God can cause the greatest damage to mankind--humans who are 100 times their size.  Nature continues to teach me object lessons.  I was "confounded" by one this week.  A small, unnoticeable tick somehow bit me.  I never knew I had a bite, but I became infected with a disease that has a high mortality rate should it go untreated.  Luckily, man has created a way around these little buggers, and I was able to get on an antibiotic, which after 5 days of absolute misery is now treating the illness.

While it is a little disconcerting to me that lives can be changed by such small means, I also realize that if God created these small creatures with such great, albeit harmful potential, the potential of his noblest creation, mankind, must be exponentially greater.  We have seen the realities of man's misuse of their capacity for greatness in more ways than one over the past several months, even days, but what about our capacity for good?  What unharnessed, unacknowledged potential for good do we have inside us?  What can we create that would change lives for the better?

In an address to women,  Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf said, The desire to create is one of the deepest yearnings of the human soul.  No matter our talents, education, backgrounds, or abilities, we each have an inherent wish to create something that did not exist before.  You might say, 'I'm not the creative type.  When I sing, I'm always half a tone above or below the note.  I cannot draw a line without a ruler.  And the only practical use for my homemade bread is as a paperweight or as a doorstop.'  If that is how you feel, think again, and remember that you are spirit daughters of the most creative Being in the universe.

So I say, even though we may feel small and simple, let's make great things happen!  God created us to do just that.

It's amazing what you can learn from a tick!

Watch this beautiful 2 minute video:
Create

Age 50 Rant

On June 18, I turned 50 years old.  Suddenly, I look at myself in the mirror and think I look 50 years old.  Suddenly, my body feels 50 years old.  What is happening to me!?!  I really didn't think it would be that big of a deal and on June 18, it wasn't!  I had a blast playing with my family.  My two out-of-state children surprised me by flying in for my birthday.  It was an awesomely wonderful weekend, but now . . . I feel it.  I really hope this is just a state of mind I can talk myself out of . . . SOON, but just in case, I have a doctor's appointment scheduled to see just how far the hormones have gone out of whack.  I really think at 50, hormones should give us women a break.  I mean REALLY, haven't they tortured us enough over the years . . . pregnancy hormones . . . baby blues . . . postpartum depression . . . premenopause . . . menopause . . . post menopause.  COME ON!  ENOUGH ALREADY!  And just when you think acne is a thing of the past, it comes back and accentuates all the liver spots!  By the way, will someone please explain why the word "men" shows up in "menopause"?!  Shouldn't it be called "womenonpause"?!  Because that is what it feels like . . . everything that used to make me feel like a women is on sabbatical . . . a very saggy, long sabbatical!

In all seriousness, my birthday was fantastic, and when I have time, I will post an awesome video recapping the wonderful time I spent with my family.  Each of them wrote me beautiful letters and notes that meant so much.  I will end with a quote my mom gave me:

Age 3:  She looks at herself and sees a queen.
Age 8:  She looks at herself and sees Cinderella.
Age 15:  She looks at herself and sees an ugly duckling (Mom, I can't go to school looking like this today!).
Age 20:  She looks at herself and sees "too fat/too thin, too short/too tall, too straight/too curly" but decides she's going out anyway.
Age 40:  She looks at herself and sees "too fat/too thin, too short/too tall, too straight/too curly" but says, "At least I am clean," and goes out anyway.
Age 50: She looks at herself and says, "I am what I am," and goes wherever she wants to go.
Age 60:  She looks at herself and reminds herself of all the people who can't even see themselves in the mirror anymore.  Goes out and conquers the world.
Age 70:  She looks at herself and sees wisdom, laughter, and ability and goes out and enjoys life.
Age 80:  Doesn't bother to look.  Just puts on a purple hat and goes out to have fun with the world.

The moral is, maybe we should all grab that purple hat a little earlier.
(Elder M. Russell Ballard)

I think I'm going to buy myself a new hat.